On yesterday’s post I was ranting for the 4859956llion time about people not shutting up or not leaving me alone at the gym. I am tired of it, not even headphones stop these animals!!!!

So, I needed another device, because my focused-serious-nasty-not interested face and my headphones were not doing it. Buying the gym and kicking them all out seems like a hassle. I haven’t used my checkbook in a while and I am not even sure where I could have left it.

But, I have been thinking for a while that I could write something VERY CLEAR (or BLUNT, or even MEAN if you want) on my shirt to shoooo them away. “Mean” is a very subjective word in the NYC terminology, but I am ready to write in caps on my forehead if necessary! So I figured I could put white duct tape on my shirt, write on it, and rip it (the tape!) off when I left the gym. Thatwould do the trick. Right?

Yesterday, I thought something like “Here to work out, not talk”…  which is great… But I’ll need something in the front AND something in the back, of course. And I think some gym apparel company could make a lot of money off this idea… just saying, they’ll owe me some royalties!!

Here’s my thoughts, for now (any others???? post below!!!):

• Shooooooo, I am not interested in chit-chat, mind the headphones
• Go back to your workout, or whatever you are pretending to do here
• No grunting, screaming, or moaning. We are all hurting and annoyed already
• Don’t be disgusting and go wipe the machines after you used them
• It’s not cool to follow me around. That is what it looks like you are doing
• Look somewhere else. I am not wearing tight and skimpy clothes because I was hoping to run into you here.
• I WILL do as many or little reps at the speed I want: it’s a free world. And I don’t need your opinion.
• Yes, I know I look amazing in my tight gym clothes. I have a mirror at home. Look somewhere else
• I am NOT in the mood to talk to YOU. Shoooo.
• No, we can’t “share” this machine. Go somewhere else for 2 minutes
• Whatever it is you gotta say, the song I am listening to is way better
• I hate when people talk to me at the gym. Or when they make eye contact. That’s for you too
• If I am in a gym, I am invisible and deaf

Too mean?Whatevs. I am totally fed up.

Yesterday I was running some errands and one of the trainers found me at the post office.!!!!!
I was in my running/gym gear and he was like Have you been at the gym today? Haven’t seen you at the gym today!! You better get to the gm today!!! FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF, I had no clue what number I would have to count to before I didn’t feel like strangling him. Three billions…? Ommmmmmmmmmmmmm.Now they’ve found a way to annoy me EVEN before I get there.
THEYARENOTGOINGTOWIN