Okay, first let me clean up my tears. You’ll see what I mean.

I’ve talked about New York Rogue Runners before. I did their Hot Dog Challenge this past march, remember? Well, I didn’t finish it, but I attented it…

This time, the 2nd Annual Dizzy Bat Race, involved no food but I was still scarred from my lack of any skill for anything so I was just there for support, cause Juan wanted to try it. These was the deal:

Rules: Each competitor will compete individually, for time. To begin, each competitor must take ten spins on the bat at home plate. Upon completion of the 10th rotation, competitors will run the bases, in order. Vomiting is permitted; straying into the infield is not.

Competitors must tag up at each base. Chewing tobacco is frowned upon. The winner shall be the competitor who makes it to home base in the least amount of time. Intercourse without foreplay shall not count.

Anyway, I get dizzy just by being alive so I wasn’t going to do it…

First, Claire goes, then Baker, then Neal…

I don’t think the pictures show how funny this can turn… I have video for Juan’s turn. Note what happens when he tries to start “running”

It’s like he’s jumping in place or something. He fell hard on the woodchips under the tree, and got a little scrape. I promise you his running form is a LOT better than that!!

More pictures before I make you cry, because you know what’s coming…

Anyway, they insisted, I said yes, because… I can’t say no to anything stoopid. So, here:

I just couldn’t stay upright. At all. I really wanted to give up after the first fall. I was SOOOO dizzy I couldn’t hold it together for a second… oh well, I am not perfect, okay?

Also, if I had thought of competing, I probably wouldn’t have worn those short tights!

   

Th truth is, I was the slowest, BUT I didn’t vomit as I did last time, AND I finished it, so I think that’s a HUGE improvement. PLUS, there was a group 10 yards away having all this delicious barbeque, I think I deserve huge props just by staying put and not wandering away!

There was an official ceremony, the winner got a check for $9.50 (the price of a beer at Yankee Stadium), a Derek Jeter mask, and a stub hub certificate for a sporting event… plus the right to make fun of me: the slowest one of them all!

  

Seriously, ridiculously, FUN

Can’t wait for the next one… The Wheelbarrow/Three-Legged Duathlon

oh wait, wait, there is more…

WORLD PREMIERE: NY Rogue Runners’ 2nd Annual Dizzy Bat Race – THE MOVIE